More Angst

I cried last night. It doesn't happen often, because it's so rare that I actually get to the point where the only way to let go is to cry. I seem to have put all these defences in place from the fear I used to have that if I started crying I'll never stop. And now that makes it so much harder to start.

I cried for Anne, and I cried because after reading L's diary entry it just all seemed so unfair. L seems so bitter and angry and unforgiving, when it was her own self-doubt and self-hate that created the whole damn mess in the first place.

I've been told many times in the past that sometimes I care too much, that sometimes I feel other people's pain too much, but I can't help it being the way I am, and I wouldn't change it for a minute. My friends are very dear to me, and I will stand by them when they need me. I will also stand up to them when I think they're being stupid. It's the way I am, and I hope it's the way I'll always be.